Crevices of the Mind
She can’t be that busy where she doesn’t bake me a cake. Right…
It’s interesting how life works (especially with my new found knowledge of astrology). Learned a tremendous amount of information this week. Not only pertaining to ________ but life in general. You know I’m really tryna get good at life. Really tryna figure out the best way for me to play it. Just like in a video game, your character only has a certain amount of opportunities to advance to the next level. The longer you stay on one level the smaller that window gets. Hmm. Smaller is all perspective based. Yeah smaller in the sense of ________. But what if smaller presented a different opportunity. What if smaller meant that you were getting closer. That your vision was that focused. Hmm.
I’m learning about myself.
Most of the time I love being around people. Naw that’s too basic of a statement. It’s the energy that I love. The bouncing of frequencies. The emotions radiating thru people. I see it. I feed off of it. I soak it in. I ask questions (sometimes too many, gotta get better at sensing when it’s enough). I burn the replies/gestures/answers in my memory.
This is me most of the time.
But weirdly amazing occurrences happen every so often. A cosmetic shift in my body chemistry takes place. A 720 degree shift in my perspective.
Instead of the outward projection of calculated randomness, I begin to go deep. Deep into the crevices of my mind. Which spawns out to this world I’m living in. Then slowly back to me and everything and everyone in close proximity.
Since these questions of self actualization cannot be answered by others, I turn inwards and fall in love. I dream. I create. I write. I do anything I can to find the truth. The truth of why I’m here. What I’m meant to be doing. Why I was chosen to lead, to innovate, to win. I’m learning more and more to not focus on the “how” because that s**t could never be answered. Too many forces outside my control for any concept to be valid. The realness is in the why and what and who. That’s where the magic is. That’s where the gold is. That’s where the victory lies.
Needs and wants have a definitive correlation. They function as siblings. Bound together for life by Mother Nature.
In order for me to be in love with myself, life, and anyone else; my needs have to be met, consistently. That’s the keyword. I crave my “need” based routines. My wants I could care less for. But my needs, my gut entrenched needs must be met. If not, I won’t function at optimal levels. At levels required for me to fulfill the lingering destiny proof moments that god has already programmed in this game of life.
Now would be a good time to end this thought…
9:28pm / 3.10.17
